Exercise after ED?

So recently I wrote a post all about the issues that I have personally found between exercise and trying to recovery from my Eating Disorder. The thing is, a lot of people have the same issues as me, even now I have to be very careful with what I allow myself to do because its still very very easy to fall back into that destructive cycle. My friends, it takes a lot of time to begin to change the relationship you have with exercise...here's my story.



I've been really open in the past over how my Anorexia ruled my life and how I would excessively ercise daily in the bid to "rid myself of the calories that I consumed, the fat that was on my body etc". Now, nearly 3 years later I'm talking on Twitter about my exercise regime and you guys expressed interest in what it is I actually do. The thing I wanted to share with you guys first is that it has taken a lot of effort in order to be able to exercise again. For someone like me, it isn't a case of exercising, beginning recovery and then exercising again. I found out something about myself...I was addicted to exercise. I don't know about you but I didn't now that this was a thing.I knew about addictions to drugs, alcohol etc and I understood that my self harm was a form of addictive behaviour but exercise addictions? I had no idea that they existed.

The only way for me to be able to get over this addiction was to completely cut the "workouts" out of my life for a while. While I was in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for a year, I was on an exercise ban. I will admit, I was quite conniving and convinced everyone that I would eat better if I could exercise to balance it out a little more. That idea went over well enough, even though there were some hesitations but let me be honest, I was using it as an excuse to actively exercise again. Again began the downward spiral until a day where I had an epiphany and I knew I had to stop if I wanted to get better. I came clean to my therapist and explained that no matter what I said in the future, Don't let me exercise until he thought I was emotionally ready.

A year after that instance, I learned some ways to cope with my past behavior whilst slowly introducing exercise back into my life again. I felt that I had began to understand the causes of my issues and now I wanted to begin to live a health lifestyle like I always wanted. In order to do this, I had to cut the forms of exercise out of my life that I was addicted to because the thoughts were attached to that actual behavior. That meant that certain forms of Pilates were off limits to me and running is too.

Now, after all this time, the exercises that I engage in all have some form of mindfulness quality to them. I'm an avid yogi (I practice yoga) and I've been slowly introducing Tai Chi into my life because Im fascinated with the attributes that it has not only for out physical bodies but our emotions as well.

What it does

There are so many different forms of exercises that not only work wonders for your physical body but for your spiritual body too; they actually have mindfulness qualities too. Two of my favourites are Yoga and Tai Chi, you all know how I've been doing yoga for a while but I jumped on the Tai Chi bandwagon recently and it's so much fun! It's a super calming exercise that literally doesn't feel like I'm doing a workout at all. It's my favourite go to thing just before sleep because I'm so relaxed when I've finished. Added to that, my posture has really improved and I am able to breathe a lot deeper because of it. As if it couldn't get any better, Tai Chi is proven to reduce Stress and improve symptoms of Anxiety and Depression.

If my gushing over it isn't enough for you, I did some research and stumbled across the lovely Eating Disorders Online site. Here's what they love about it;

1. Tai chi, although it is often practiced in groups, is non-competitive. The focus is on one’s own movement, breath, and physical sensations. This creates tranquility within and without. Classes tend to be supportive and encouraging.
2. People of all ages, shapes, sizes, states of health, and fitness levels practice tai chi, and it is generally done wearing loose-fitting, comfortable clothing.
3. Some individuals with an eating disorder feel disconnected from their bodies. Tai chi not only develops awareness of bodily sensations; it also helps people sense the position of their bodies in space (called proprioception). Plus, increased awareness of physical sensations helps some individuals get in better touch with their emotions.
4. Research suggests tai chi helps people maintain good bone density, and bone density can be an issue in some eating disorders.
5. For those who struggle with sleep problems, regular tai chi practice may improve both the length and quality of sleep.
6. Learning even a short tai chi form is a mental and physical accomplishment, and accomplishments are usually accompanied by a boost in self-appreciation.
7. This type of gentle, compassionate, physical exercise has the potential to reshape a person’s self-image and how he or she thinks about his or her body.
8. Learning tai chi is a mental discipline. It takes people’s minds off their problems, worries, and pressures – a healthy distraction that, over time, can nurture a habit of mental tranquility.

I hope this post helps any of you struggling with this same issue.

Love,
Louise x