Even after I wrote the post explaining why I wanted to change up the way I was blogging and the sort of things that I posted about, one thing that I wanted to continue with related to Mental Health is my A-Z of Recovery series. I started this at the beginning of the year and I'm really happy with how consistent I have been with it and I still really enjoy writing about some of these topics and so here it is!
Before "Empty Journal" even existed, some of you may know that this blog was called "Perks of Recovery" and was a complete Mental health blog. The whole messaging behind my Twitter and the blog back in 2013 was to promote recovery and how much of your life that you get back from these terrible illnesses. When you are in the thick of any illness, be it physical or mental, it is very hard to imagine life afterwards.
I imagine that if you scroll back to a year ago then pretty much everything that you read on here will be about the kind of emotional positivity and physical strength and well-being that you get back throughout your recovery process.
In my experience, and through common consensus with everyone who I have ever had the privilege to chat with, no matter what mental illness you suffer with, there always seems to be some kind of physical problem that has originated. This can be something like being stuck in the house because you’re too afraid to leave, you don’t he the energy to leave or you are quite literally confined to the house.
Throughout my 3 years in recovery I have slowly been able to gain back things in life that I hadn’t even necessarily been aware that I had lost. Although I now have some very painful joint issues, I can now go for walks for longer than maybe 5 mins at a time. I thoroughly enjoy getting out and doing some for of exercise so even though I’m very careful about not overdoing anything because that was a huge issue before but the sense of freedom is immense.
Taking back your life is amazing because you find this well of strength inside of yourself that you never even knew that you had. You are able to socialise with your friend (for some people, just being able to HAVE friends is a big accomplishment after a MH issue) and you can begin to pick up the pieces of your life again.
There are always so many things in life that we want to do, things that for whatever reason we are unable to do. For some of us, the reason why we cannot do something can be remedied after a lot of time and effort. If you had the chance to live your dream, would you not want to take it? If you had the chance to actually LIVE would you not want to take it?
Sometimes in life there are times when we have to make decisions. These decisions can have a lot of impact on what happens in our future. You have the decision everyday to either do something to make you proud, to give you a better future or one that is easier and keeps you in the same place.
No one wants to suffer. No one wants to live a life where we hate ourselves and feel like our life has no meaning and we should not even be here. Life is hard, that’s just all their is to it...but it can get easier. It doesn’t always have to be bad, you just have to make a few decisions.
Realistically it is a sad shame but a lot of us would not be here right now if we had not made the choice for recovery every single day (for however long you’ve been trying). No matter whether you’ve been clean for 1 day or 1 year, whether you’ve made the choice to TRY to get better with help today or a week ago, you are taking charge. This illness will no longer rule your entire being. There will be says where life is hard, where the choices you make don’t always fit with what your kind is telling you but you have to stay strong and do what is right for yourself.
If you are reading this right now and you are struggling with yourself then I want you to know something; IT DOES GET BETTER. Life isn’t sunshine and rainbows but it’s a day of ups, downs and roller coaster loops. It’s a fun ride, not always smooth sailing but life would be boring if it were. You can do this. No matter how bad you think you are, no matter how worthless you feel, you are loved and you have so much more to experience.
Stay strong my friends because there is a whole new beautiful shining world out there just waiting for you to find it!
Love,
Louise x
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