Find Inner Peace (Sticks and Stones)

Hey guys, happy April! This is a month of beauty, inside and out. its a time for celebration not just because this month is associated with the Goddess Aphrodite and the love and beauty that she brings into the world, but also because April is the month of Buddha’s birthday. He is a symbol of peace and tranquility after a new start so don't be afraid if things begin to change. Change is good; it allows us to move forward.

Yoga Pose/Stretch

Virabhadrasana II (Warrior Pose II)

1. Stand in the Mountain Pose. Exhale, stepping your feet wide apart
2. Inhale and raise your arms parallel to the floor and reach them actively out to the sides, shoulder blades wide, palms down.
3. Inhale and turn your left foot and leg out 90 degrees to the left, lining the heel of your left foot up with the arch of your right foot.
4. Inhale, and as you exhale bend your left knee, forming a right angle with your left thigh and shin. Stack your knee directly above your ankle in line with your second toe. (Hint: Lining your front knee up with your second toe and bringing your thigh parallel to the floor protects your knee and strengthens the muscles around it. )
5. Relax your shoulders away from your ears and turn your head to gaze out over your left hand. Reach through your arms, feeling a line of energy from the tips of your right fingers through the tips of your left. Relax your jaw. Hold for 3 to 10 slow, deep breaths.
6. To come out of the pose, turn your head back to face forward, straighten your left leg, and rotate it back, bringing your feet to parallel.
7. Turn your right leg out 90 degrees to switch sides and repeat.

Benefits of Virabhadrasana II

• Strengthens legs, shoulders and arms
• Stretches groins, chest, shoulders, thighs and ankles
• Expands your chest, lungs and shoulders.
• Increases stamina and endurance.
• Relieves backaches, especially through the second trimester of pregnancy.
• Improves balance, concentration and core awareness.
• Helps endurance
• Reduces weariness
• Enhances self confidence
• Improves a scattered mind
• Aids an imbalanced spirit

I learnt so much last month, but my main lesson was that sometimes we need to let go in order to move on and be happier. It’s often easy to hold a grudge against yourself and other people, but what do we gain from that? Anger. Sadness. Maybe even jealousy?

So our message for you all this month is to start letting go of the grudges, of the stress, heartbreak, pain. Let go and you’ll find yourself to be much happier because of it.

“Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without”

Don’t give up,

Alyssa & Louise

March Sticks & Stones

Sticks and Stones

Your Guide to the Month of March

Hey guys, welcome back! For those of us that live in the Northern Hemisphere, spring officially begins this month - yay! This month symbolises new life and new beginnings, so take struggle in your stride and make March your month. We thought we’d share this idiom with you to kick start this month;

“March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb”

This means that the first days of March are often stormy, and the last days are mild and warm. So no matter what happens this month, good or bad, make the most of it and try to stay positive.

So March is a special month for us because of one more reason; its Alyssa’s 18th birthday on the 5th! It’s a huge milestone and we’ll write a blog post about what we get up to and how we celebrate, so it’ll be like you were all there with us!

Yoga Pose/Stretch

Virabhadrasana I (Warrior Pose I)

1. Stand in the Mountain Pose. Exhale, stepping your feet wide apart
2. Place your hands on your hips and turn your right leg and foot out by 90 , with your right heel directly opposite the inner arch of your left foot.
3. Turn your left leg and foot in by about 45 degrees.
4. Turn your chest to the right, pressing your left hip forwards to square your hips.
5. Inhale and raise your arms above your head, bringing your palms together and looking straight forward
6. Exhale and bend your right knee to a 90 degree angle - it should be right over your ankle - and take a moment to balance yourself.
7. Lean your head back and gaze upwards at your fingertips as you drop your tailbone down towards the floor. To deepen the stretch, gently arch your back.
8. Hold for 5 breaths.
9. Inhale, straighten your legs and lower your arms, then bring your legs together to return to the Mountain Pose.
10. Repeat on the other side.

Benefits of Virabhadrasana I

• Improves focus, balance and stability
• Energises entire body
• Improves concentration and core awareness
• Improves flexibility
• Boosts resolve and self-confidence
• Opens hips, chest and lungs and improves breathing

Lessons we have learned this month;

Although there are so many times when it seems like you have lost your footing on your road to recovery. You are trying to “climb that mountain” but you keep slipping? This is all part of the process. We need to make the decision for recovery every day because there are always going to new circumstances in each and every day. It doesnt matter how many times you relapse, as long as you get back onto the road of recovery.

Thanks for sticking with us for another month - we appreciate everyone that reads our blog. We hope that you have a fantastic spring (or Autumn if you live in the Southern Hemisphere!) and make the most of every chance that comes your way this month, and the rest of your life. Remember - “your attitude is your altitude; it determines how high you fly”.

Don’t give up,

- Alyssa & Louise

Where we have been

So lately we have both been pretty absent from the realm of social media. Needless to say, because we are coming to the end of our final year at sixth form our work load has increased greatly and it is often hard to find time to set aside for blogging, tweeting and planning.

This post is just a little reminder to let you all know that we are still continuing with the Sticks & Stones and other regular posts. There are also extra surprises that we have been hinting about for a while now.

So you have to stick around to find out what they are ;)

Stay strong, love yourself and do what you love.
-Louise xoxo

Letting Go

Letting Go

This week is Eating Disorders Awareness Week 2015. 

It jogged my memory that it was about time I wrote another post ……

One of the hardest things for me is having the confidence to “let go” and to let my loved one take more responsibility for her eating disorder.

You carry your children for 9 months (actually 9 ½ in my case), feed them, nurture them, run  round after them, embarrass them (not sure that my son has ever forgiven me for dashing onto a rugby pitch to check he was alright! J )… and the whole point of this is so that they grow up to become independent and good people and you let go…..

I will be honest – this is not something I have found easy – my children mean the world to me and my instinct to protect them is rather strong.  I am a worrier.  Couple this with a child with an eating disorder and it is even harder.  I so much want to protect her, want her to be well, want her to be independent and at the same time my mother’s instinct kicks in and I am scared to let go, scared that she needs my help, scared that she won’t eat.

At the height of her illness my daughter went to university – I supported her decision to leave hospital and to do this – despite wanting to envelop her in “cotton wool” – I let her go – even writing to her medical team to show support for this idea.   I feel like I lived these years in a state of constant worry – behind the scenes I was ensuring care was in place, I trusted her to let me know when she was struggling and I would hop on a train and stay nearby for a few days.  The university medical centre took care of her – monitoring her regularly.  I had to trust that they were doing their job.  I had to trust that my daughter was being open with them.  It was hard – but how proud I was of her on the day she graduated, I was so pleased that I had been able to let go enough to let her achieve this .  She needed to experience the world for herself.

My daughter came back home after uni and lived here for a while.  It was hard – my protective instincts cut in again when I could visibly see that she wasn’t eating enough, that she was spending hours at the gym.  We tried the encouragement, we tried the nagging – at the stage of illness my daughter was at – it didn’t help – in fact it made things worse.  She understandably felt that we were watching her all the time.  I knew the GP was monitoring her so I forced myself to try to ignore the ED behaviour (I admit that I wasn't always 100% successful at this!)  – and what do you know – it didn’t get any worse – in fact she managed and far far better than I thought she would.

At some point, a person with an Eating Disorder needs to take responsibility for themselves, they need to learn how to manage it themselves.....

Letting go – it is hard – but just sometimes (depending on the circumstances) it can be the right thing to do.

Ann

Happy New Year! (Sticks and Stones)

The Sticks and Stones

Your Guide to the Month of January

Hey guys, it’s Alyssa and Louise here to wish you a happy New Year! The new year symbolises a time for new beginnings, new possibilities and more fun. So, with that said, welcome to our brand new blog series “Sticks & Stones”! We have so much in store for 2015, and we hope that you will join us on our journey.

January is the national thank you month, so we’d like to take this opportunity to thank everyone that has helped and supported us on our journey so far;

• Frankie
• Matthew
• Bridget
• Devon / The Love Spreader
• Megan 
• Brittany // RecoverySpirit

We really appreciate everything that these people have done for us, we are so grateful for all of the support and guidance that these people have provided for us over the past year and a half that we have been on this blog.

It’s so important to thank people for whatever support they give us, and to show that we are grateful, which is why we now want to challenge you guys to make a list of everyone that you were grateful for in 2014! We also want you to make a list of everything that you hope to have accomplished by the end of the year. Here are ours:

• Be able to do the downward dog
• Be able to hold a headstand 
• Be able to do the splits
• Reach 10,000 blog views
• Write a book
• Continue to be happy

Now I suppose we should tell you a bit about what Sticks & Stones will entail…

• A new smoothie recipe each month
• A yoga pose to help you relax
• A lesson we learnt last month (life lessons)

Did you know: the 3rd of January is “the festival of sleep” day? Haha! This holiday is celebrated by learning about and experiencing a sound sleep after the busyness of the holidays is over! Take this time to sleep in and give your mind and body the rest it deserves!

Smoothie Recipe of the Month

Winter Berries

• 1 cup of organic frozen berries (any kind)
• 2 cups of fresh spinach
• ginger
• Water (add depending on how thick/thin you want it)

This smoothie tastes great with ice cream, just make sure you don't overdo the ginger! 

Yoga Pose/Stretch

Tadasana (The Mountain Pose) to welcome the new year

• Stand with your feet together, big toes touching, spine straight, and head erect.
• Lift your kneecaps, activating your quads, and press the tops of your thighs back as you point your tailbone down between your heels.
• Lengthen your spine up, broaden across your collarbones, let your shoulders slide down your back, and stretch your arms down alongside the body, fingers spread and active.
• Hold for 5 to 10 breaths.

image source:http://iml.jou.ufl.edu

Benefits of Tadasana:

• Improves posture and relieves tension, aches, and pains throughout the body.
• Develops strength and flexibility simultaneously, especially in the spine
• Increases awareness and steadies breathing
• Increases strength, power, and mobility in the feet, legs, and hips 
• Develops strength and flexibility simultaneously, especially in the spine
• Improves blood circulation
• Encourages healthy digestion and elimination
• Leaves you feeling refreshed and rejuvenated
• Expels dullness and depression and harmonizes the body and mind
• Increases energy and enthusiasm

Did you know: squirrel appreciation day and Thomas Crapper day both fall on the 27th of January! A day dedicated to squirrels and the man who invented the flush toilet, wow...

It’s almost time for us to sign off, but first we’d just like to share a lesson that we learnt in 2014;
We’ve both learnt how to become more conscious; of our time, feelings/emotions and workload. Both in school and here on our blog, neither of us were managing our time well, which meant that school work stressed us out more than we should and we neglected the blog. We had some sort of an epiphany and decided that we need to spend more time on our school work (we’re both in our last and most important year of school before we are left to venture off into the wider world on our own - ahhh) and manage our ‘blogging time’ more efficiently, which is why we came up with this monthly blog series; this way we have at least one post a month. We’ve also come up with a timeline, which gives us a list of blog-related things we hope to have accomplished by the end of each month/year. This has really helped us both manage our work, as we used to spend some of our study periods focusing on blogging instead of studying, because we now know exactly what needs to be done and by when, and if we have any free time we can make ourselves ahead of schedule!


Thank you all so much for reading our blog, it means more to us than you will ever know. We are looking forward to continuing our journey on Perks Of Recovery with all of you.


“Since everything is a reflection of our minds, everything can be changed by our minds” - Buddha.

Don’t give up,

Alyssa & Louise

Things that no one tells you about being a mental health blogger

Things that no one tells you about being a mental health blogger.

- It is a very sensitive subject. - That sounds completely obvious right? "of course it's sensitive. It's people's mental health" Well as simple as it sounds reading it, writing this posts is anything but easy. It takes a lot of planning, writing and re-writing posts to ensure that we have not made the subject come off in the wrong way. writing posts for over a year about mental health has been very hard. A blog in my opinion (especially our blog niche) should be easy and fun to read. The things that we talk about are the complete opposite. We cannot make it sound like light-hearted conversations with you via a computer screen because it's simply not possible.

- There is a very narrow topic choice. - When we started this blog it was because we wanted to help others. It was also like a therapy session for us because we had to turn our negative feelings and actions into positive ones. The whole meaning of the blog is to promote recovery so we cannot include any negative messages no matter how we are feeling. This is very restricting when it comes to writing posts.

- We are not qualified. - whatever is said on this blog, we have to check it thoroughly. Any person that is in any kind of mind-frame can stumble across our blog. If we post promoting certain objects, techniques etc or someone takes our advice the wrong way then we are in deep doo-doo. We are in no way qualified to talk about mental health the same way that therapists are. (Although I do have an online certificate in mental health). We are not qualified. That is why we constantly remind people that the things that we talk about are from our own personal experiences and what has worked for us.

- it's hard to keep digging up the past. - Part of my recovery was going to therapy to find out where the root cause of my problems were. This inevitably meant that I would have to go through my backstory because that was the logical thing to do. Writing posts about problems that I would rather leave in the past or about very difficult times for me is very hard. We cannot live in the past, we have to learn from the past but not let it control us.

-We have very little privacy.- We share some of our deepest darkest secrets on here. These are the kind of things that people never want to share with anyone, sometimes even their friends and family. Yet we share our full stories. This means that we have very little privacy when it comes to our life.

-A lot of hate. - There can be a lot of hate on the Internet. There are many people who could say that we are doing this blog for attention. That of course isn't true. Just like real life, the Internet can be used as a force for good or a force of negativity. So all of these things sound very negative. I have one thing to tell you all though... There is nothing in this world that I would trade for doing this blog. It has been our saviour. Do not forget that with every bad thing in the world, there are more good things happening.

What are some of your favourite things about blogging or owning a helpful social media account?

-Louise xoxo

Recovery is okay

When I first began my journey through recovery, part of me was so sick of feeling horrible and hating myself. Another part of myself wanted to feel the way that I did because it somehow made up for these things that I decided I had done (even though I hadn't done any of these bad things). It took a while for me to realise that part of me wanted to keep feeling the way I was purely because then it proved the struggles that I have been through. my struggles have never been anything that I have been embarrassed about. They have made me who i am today. I almost did not want to leave that part of my life behind because I thought the damage was too big a part of me to let go.

After reading many quotes about recovery and going to CBT for many sessions, I finally realised that my recovery is not about magically making all of my problems disappear. Its about acknowledging that they are there and no longer letting them control my life. They will always be there. That's something no one can control but the truth of the matter is that I just need to leave those thoughts in the background. You don't listen to the voices or engage with the thoughts.

Do not be afraid of the change that recovery brings

- Louise xoxo

ED recovery

See this picture right here? This was me last year. It wasnt even my lowest weight from my eating issues. I hated myself. I thought I was fat and everyone hated me. I see pictures on social media sites of "thinspo" pictures and now it just makes me sick.

This wasn't healthy. I was eating less than 1/4 of a meal per day. It still wasn't enough. Nothing I did, no matter how much I harmed myself both internally and externally, it wasn't enough. I was constantly cold, tired and dizzy. 

Only now do I realise just how badly I was treating myself. Since beginning my ED recovery, I have hated the weight that I have gained. The truth of the matter is, I needed it. My facial bones were protruding and I looked down right ill.  

This post is more for me at the moment because I am having trouble with accepting my body. I'm constantly comparing it to other people's bodies that are much slimmer but I needed to do this to prove to myself just how wring my behaviour was before and just how far I have come.  My weight gain isn't a sign of weakness at all, but a sign of strength because I was able to Eat meals on a more regular basis. For now I am working on encouraging myself to eat properly. I will create a suitable exercise routine for myself that complements my mental and emotional health when I am ready.

Take things one step at a time and wait until you are ready. This is not a process to be rushed.

STAY STRONG 

-Louise xoxo 

One step at a time

When you're hitting a wall, focus on one brick. - Tyler May

Whether you have been reading our blog for a while and following our journey with us or you are a new-comer to Perks Of Recovery you will probably be struggling with some personal issues. Whatever they may be, know that you are not alone. 

It may feel like even beginning to recover is a really hard path to go down and you constantly come across obstacles that are in your way. Those walls can seem so daunting and no matter how hard you try, you just cannot climb over them. For me personally, it made me question whether I was good enough for recovery, whether I was good enough to be able to enjoy my life again.

As some of you will know, I am a picture hoarder and spend 99% of my time on sites such as Pinterest, weheartit and tumblr etc. So naturally my collection of quote pictures has increased by the thousands (no joke) and one common factor that I found all/most of my pictures have are that they talk about recovery as a process. That's a message that is constantly put out there but no one really seems to explain much about this process. The easiest and most symbolic way that I have ever heard it explained is through Tyler May's quote. If you look at all of your obstacles a brick wall then you can see it as an immovable force. Just like your recovery, if you focus on taking down just one brick at a time and being satisfied with that progress then you will get there. Soon enough your wall will be gone and you can continue on your life's journey. 

Take recovery one step at a time

Stay Strong
-Louise xoxoxo

Keep Going

"Never give in. Never give in. Never, never, never, never – in nothing, great or small, large or petty – never give in, except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force. Never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy." - Winston Churchill

I thought I'd share this quote with you as a reminder to never give up on yourself, and to always stay strong. No matter how difficult it seems, never give in.

Today's lesson

Okay so it’s been a while since I've posted on here. I guess Alyssa and I have been so excited about the things that we have been planning and working with those that we have neglected the blog. Don’t worry, we are back!

So today I went to CBT, I have been going for several months now and am soon going for a referral to a psychologist. This is great news for me but one thing I wanted to tell you about is an activity that vie done today.

It’s called the use of value cards (I think). The aim of the exercise is to sort the cards into 3 different piles, the things we have most important, and the things that are kind of important to you and the things that are the least important. After this stage you then have to pick the top 3 from each category. I bet now you’re thinking, okay that’s great and everything but is there a point to it…..yes there is!

When I was looking over my top cards with my therapist, I had to discuss why they had such a high meaning to me. I realised that they all connected and fit in perfectly with my negative core beliefs. After further discussion, he pointed out to me that the things that I valued most in life in fact the things that I already have. Ergo, in changing who I am because of past experiences and in actual fact the way that I am already is what allows me to make connections and relationships with others. So my self-hatred is now clearer to me as being wrong because I do not need to change myself to ensure that others like me, they like me for who I am already.

….it’s a bit of a long story but basically, we are all we need to be in life. Don’t try to change yourself to make other people happy because the best kind of people like you for who your are

Stay Strong

Louise 

xoxo

I tell the world!

Okay guys, so I haven't been on here in a while but a lot of you know that recently I have been on NCS with the challenge over summer. I have had such an amazing time and met wonderful people that have really changed my life for the better. During week 2, we attended a speakers trust conference about public speaking. I was tasked, along with everyone else in my wave, to write a speech about something I am passionate about changing in the community. Because it it very close to my heart, naturally I chose mental health stigma. That  very day I had forgotten to take my medication and so my anxiety was a little high but the amazing bond and care that my team showed when I had to leave to go back to the flats and take it astonished me. It gave me the confidence to come clean to those 12 people about the fact that I suffer from multiple mental health illnesses.

It was a very risky thing for me to do and I'm so grateful that I came to a point where I was able to tell them, especially as we had only known each other a little over a week. It really makes me happy to be able to say that they accepted it completely. My mentor knew how close to my heart it was before others (because he already knew) and he helped me gain the confidence to tell everyone else. They still treated me the same as they did before and supported me completely.

Over the course of the day, my team had to choose 3 people to present their speech to over 60 people (aka my wave and some mentors) and surprise surprise, they voted for me to present mine. They were all very considerate of my feelings with the way that I may feel about presenting a speech that was very 'close to home'. Thankfully I found the courage to do just that! I said my speech to the wave and told them that I was ill and the affects that stigma had on me. It felt good to give a speech on mental health and make people more aware of the issues that follow it. I was met with a very positive response from everyone and was very happy about the outcome.

I'm also pleased to inform you that one of the other groups campaigns is based on depression and the stigma attached so there will be more details on that for you soon.

"never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game"
Louise xoxo

My life; I wouldn't change

My turn for the worst has been a rather long and tiresome journey. Although I am 17 now, I have suffered with all variations of depression, from severe to suicidal to even a minimal amount. I will start from the beginning and in order. 

The earliest I can remember of any signs of myself with depression was 13 years ago. I was greatly fond of my uncle, I was closer to him than my own parents. He decided to get into a relationship with my closest friends mother, to which he stopped visiting me. Remember, I was only about 4 years old when this happened and for me, that was a big deal. He bought me all the things little kids would adore, and all was gone overnight. Being so young I had no clue of other things happening at the same time; those of which I understand now. 

Later on in life, I started losing contact with many of my family members; aunties/uncles and so on. Now, I only have contact with my mother and father, I have also lost my siblings. I love my parents only because I will only ever have one mother and one father; I don't agree with everything they have done. Granted, they both have done everything they can to make me happy and to protect me. My father has suffered with bad drinking habits for over 20 years and some minor depression. My mother has suffered with severe depression, anxiety and a minor case of schizophrenia. My mother ended my parents nearly 26 year long relationship because she had found another man. What she didn't realise was how much it would affect me.

 Not long after this had happened, my longest relationship fell through and under so much stress and pressure from everything; I took an overdose. The amount I took didn't affect me luckily. My dad's own business fell through about a month before meaning there wasn't much money for any of us and my mother doesn't work. 

I was teased throughout my school years. I was teased and bullied for 8 years straight and it started when I was in year 4, I'm not sure what that would be for anyone not in the UK. Due to my uncle suddenly leaving, I gained some sort of depression which caused me to gain weight. To this day I'm still trying to like who I am. I was teased about my weight until I went to secondary school (high school). When I then started there, people bullied me. They threw things at me verbally insulted me and even poured liquids on me. To this day I still believe what they said. For anyone who is interested, although embarrassing, people commented on my hygiene. Saying I smelt of this that and the other. The real fact was, I have 7 cats, 3 dogs and a parrot, which would amount to a strange smell of animals. The worst part was, not only was I bullied and teased by students; but also staff. They called me into offices and told me I should go and have a wash but there was not a day I went in with greasy hair or a smudge of dirt on my body. I still don't know if what they said is true or why they even did it. I was reduced to tears many times in that place, it has affected me that much that sometimes I'm scared to go out in case I see one of the former bullies or even the staff. At the time of bullying, I was so scared if someone had to sit near me, I was scared if the teacher had to mark my work; I used to move away in my chair as much as I could. I reported a few times but it only got worse and nothing was really done, so I gave up in the end. I can honestly say, I didn't even get a true friend out of that school. My college life has been decent compared to my school, which I am glad about. Now I am on two anti depressants a day in the morning to try and help me feel better. I'm not sure if they're worth it. I don't know if it is the anti depressants making me feel better or if it is things in my life getting better.

It hasn't helped me with my dad's constant drinking all my life, seeing how bad he would get and how it pushed the family apart didn't help me at all. My moms past hasn't helped at all, she now hears voices of a man she was once with, saying everything is her own fault. Trying to help her handle her constant breakdowns had emotionally drained me. 

Overall, most of the ways it has affected me are obviously negative such as depression and anxiety. However there is positives too, all of these things which have happened has given me experience in life. For example, if I never got bullied and teased, I would either have turned out to be a girl who thinks she is better than everyone else or I would have been a bully. If I never took an overdose then I wouldn't have got the help I needed and now I can say I can help others in that situation. Everything that has happened in my life has made me who and what I am now. Probably sounds cliche as you hear it all the time, right? But without all those negatives, would I really have found a better positive from it? You have to have been in that situation before to actually help someone and to say you feel sorry for them. 

Yes, it's been a rough and tiresome journey but I wouldn't change my past now. It has made me a wiser, better young adult. There will always be positives and negatives in every situation but take a moment to think. There's more positives than negatives. 

It has been rewarding to say the least. 

-Katie 

Perks of Recovery

Hey guys. I haven't posted on here for a while (and for a while, I mean a while). This is mainly because I don't know what to post anymore. I feel like I can't relate anymore and I'm finding it hard to write posts about 'how I cope' when I don't feel like I'm coping anymore; I'm living. I guess that's the perk of recovery.

This blog was very much a coping mechanism for me and, whilst trying to help others on here and on our twitter, I felt like I was helping myself. But I don't need that anymore. I wish I could tell you all why, but I really don't know. I don't remember the last time I hurt myself. I don't remember the last time I felt really depressed. I don't remember and don't know what finally clicked inside of me, but it did.

I wish I knew all of the answers and I wish I knew what to tell you guys that would help you, but I didn't realise that I was actually recovering until I felt 'fully recovered'. Regardless, I will try to give at least some guidance.

Get off twitter.

Lets think about this. In the real world, surrounding yourself with negative people, negative thoughts and negative influences will have a negative impact on you, right? So why is it any different online?

Following accounts that post negative thoughts is not going to help. Tweeting your negative thoughts for other people to see is not going to help. Yes I know that, in that moment, people will see what you're saying and can offer you help and guidance. Yes I know that, in that moment, you can do the same for others. But it's always a temporary fix.

I know it's nice to feel like you can relate to how someone is feeling, but it does more bad than good, trust me. I spent so much time on our twitter, scrolling through our timeline and replying to people saying that they want to hurt themselves, or even kill themselves and, as someone who was unstable at the time, that was not good for me. We are already crowded with our own thoughts of self hatred, and reading tweet after tweet after tweet about how worthless other people feel and how much other people hate themselves just adds fuel to the fire.

My point is, if you were a recovering drug addict, would you surround yourself with people that take drugs? No. If you're taking your recovery seriously you need to step away and create some mind space. 

So, my advice to you is, either unfollow all of the 'depression accounts' and follow people that tweet messages of positivity and inspiration or get off twitter. It's the same with tumblr and any other social networking site too.

Please take this step seriously. You probably don't know now how much of an impact it has on you, but you will.

Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone.

This can be really hard for some. In fact, it's really hard for all of us, but it'll all be worth it in the end. It can be as simple as overcoming a fear of heights or joining a club.

Honestly, I think this is the step that really kickstarted my recovery. I took part in something called NCS (National Citizen Service) last year, and it has really changed my life. I won't write much about it in this post, as it will be too long, but I'll do a separate post about it in the future. Louise is also taking part in it this year, after seeing how much it has benefited me, and it's also helped her a lot too! It will be worth taking part in NCS if it's available to you (for 15-17 year olds in the England and parts of Northern Ireland only, sorry!) or looking for something similar! Even just volunteering somewhere like a soup kitchen or some sort of charity will be awesome!

Set goals.

This one is simple but effective! This is a good encouragement for people with suicidal thoughts, or at least it was for me in my case. Write down your "recovery bucket list" - i.e. things that make you happy, what makes recovery worth it etc.

Here's a few of mine - 

• to be happy
• to be confident
• to be successful
• to have a family
• to meet Will Smith
• to meet Tinie Tempah (which I have, woo! :D)
• to be an actress

They might change over time, but they remind me that I have something to look forward to and something to move towards! 

There are more recovery tips on our advice and our alternatives to self harm pages. Feel free to ask me anything or give us some of your tips in the comments, we are open to blog suggestions, constructive criticism and ideas!

- A

The evolution of POR; 1 year today!!!

It seems so crazy to think that 1 whole year ago today, Alyssa and I set up Perks Of Recovery. I still remember the account creation and my confusion of using blogger ;) .

We have both come so far over the past 12 months. I have gone from the girl who would over-exercise, self harm amd cry myself to sleep at night to 4 months clean and im now going to CBT for my Anorexia! I am very proud of the way that I have managed to turn my life around. Getting help was the best decision that I ever made. Having the diagnosis actually empowered me because it was no longer just me feeling sorry for myself. I was able to aknowledge the fact that I am ill. That fact allowed me to finally be able to begin to take care of myself properly. I still have a long way to go before I am recovered but it is uplifting to think that I am a lot closer to my goal than I was yesterday or the day before that. Perks Of Recovery (and Alyssa for beginning this journey with me) have helped me save my own life.

I (Alyssa) have also begun taking care of myself properly. I no longer feel depressed & I'm no longer overwhelmed with self hatred and suicidal thoughts. I hope that every single person that reads this post is able to recover as well as I have. Thank you all so much for reading our blog and we hope that our posts continue to help people with mental illness. I'm really looking forward to the future of Perks of Recovery. 

This year has been amazing. Stay strong

-Alyssa and Louise xoxo

Learning More About Mental Health

I am currently studying online with ALISON and I have to tell you, I'm having a lot of fun! the two courses that I am currently undergoing are diploma in mental health studies and mental health & illness. Its so flexible and so everything that I learn I can do at my own pace and I get to learn in my own way.

Improving my knowledge on mental health will help me not just with this blog but with my career prospects....yes, I have finally decided what I want to do! My career choice is as a Primary Care Graduate Mental Health Worker, and combining this with Perks Of Recovery, I am so happy that I will be able to make a difference.

This time last year I never thought that I would know what I want to do. My life was a mess because of my illness' and I couldn't see a way out. It was actually July last year when I first went for help for my depression, self harm and anorexia. It was only when I got the diagnosis of all of those along with anxiety that I felt like I could maybe get better. It has been a long and painful road and though I know I'm no where near the end of this journey I am SO grateful for the things that it has taught me. I now have new friends that I love to talk to, I feel like I'm doing something worthwhile, my friendship with Alyssa has strengthened and now I have career prospects.

Don't give up, sometimes there really is a silver lining in every cloud (cheesy, I know)
Stay Strong
-Louise xoxo

p.s. I have an assessment for my suitability to CBT on Friday!!!!!